Sunday

there are lumps in the batter, but then, there were last time, and they turned out ok. at eight, a child should know how to silence a smoke alarm by flapping a magazine at it. i can't really wait for help with the table until you have uploaded your amusing video to You've Been Framed, no. you can put my name on it, yes. no, i was not born in 1966, you misheard me, cheers. help yourselves, i'll just change 'my depressing music'. not with your fingers. every one has to have cabbage. except him. you know why not. stop pretending to play Total Wipeout, please. i mean it. you can't have another Yorkshire Pudding until you eat something else. why do you call them Hedges? because there are spots on them. don't laugh at him, he is a show-off. are you eating everything in turn? do you think this is why you always finish last? no, it doesn't matter at all. put that down and pick it up with a fork. oh very clever. shoving it all in so you evade doing as i say. don't argue, your mouth is full. go to the toilet, but be quick, and wash your hands. with a fork. not until you eat something else. why are you running round and round? pins and needles? can you sit down again- it'll go off soon. your way probably is quicker, but- he is Not the Sucker Punch. once more and you'll have 5 minutes in your room afterwards. no, i'll clean up, she's still eating. what has he done? mint sauce on what?  enough, go to your room. yes, you can go and do your boy stuff. where did you get that from- oh, he stole it while you were in the loo. don't cry, there's another. can i put that in the dishwasher now? good girl. well, that was nice.